The Third Act

first of the season...

The temperatures have been dipping down into the 40's at night.  Daytime temps have been in the 60's for a couple days.  Consequently, the house has been getting progressively cooler.  At night it's been fine since I put the flannel sheets on the bed and with the regular comforter (haven't switched to down yet) I've been quite comfortable.  But this morning, it felt just a tad chilly inside.  Instead of switching on the furnace, I decided to fire up the wood stove for the first time this season...and it's wonderful!

Whether it's the fact that it finally feels like autumn, or just a seasonal change in general (it happens in the spring too), there's a rush of lovely energy.  It makes me want to do things!  There's a sense of optimism and hope, even if the general trend is to make things cozy and go more within into the oncoming darkness.  Whatever it is, I'll take it.

 

 

 

 

out back

It's funny how I'm thinking an indication of feeling better, feeling more myself, is the fact that I went out back and cut up kindling today.  The large limb that fell from an oak at the back of my property (and knocked out power for several hours) has been languishing all through the summer.  Hot and humid and gross, on top of an usually taxing emotional season, left me hunkered indoors much of the time.  And when the body doesn't feel whole and hearty, it makes things even more challenging.  But the weather has finally turned autumn like.  With the delivery of firewood this week, I was finally motivated to get out there and get something done. 

I've been ruminating on a pinhole series lately, but not ready to forge ahead.  Looking over some of my old Flickr photos, I was inspired to bring out the digital slr to run through some thoughts, once I finished cutting up wood (for the day...still lots more out there!).  While the light here still doesn't compare (in my opinion) to what I experienced in California, autumn does a good job and helping it come close.

 

 

 

 

 

autumn...at last

Today was gray and cool.  The forecast is finally keeping us closer to seasonal temperatures.  Hallelujah!!  It's been a long time coming this year.

Typically I'm not a fan of gray days, but mostly when they follow one another for many days in a row.  Today, however, the gray was welcome.  The house feels cozy.  The light is dim, yet warm inside.  We had our walkies, Avery and I, and I had gotten out earlier for a little dog walking gig.  It's breezy and just a tad rainy, although not nearly enough in that regard.  The leaves got wet enough to brighten up their drab brown (so far, a colorful fall is questionable given the drought).  All in all, though, my spirits are lifted by this seasonal change.

I'm still hunkered down and being a hermit.  It's hard to say how long that will last.  With many aspects of life at this point, patience seems to be the best course to take.  I'm okay enough and I'm grateful for that.

I pulled out my old copy of The Artist's Way.  A friend on YouTube mentioned the book in one of her videos, which was timely for me.  I don't believe I ever read it all the way through, or if I did I didn't take the exercises very seriously.  If I recall, at the time it felt like I was forcing myself to do the work and I allowed distraction in.  Now, however, my life is very different than before and I'm actually enthusiastic about the process.  Again...patience.

 

 

 

hermitting

That's what's been my m.o. this, oh, what?  Past month or so?  It's out of character in some ways (in other ways, no).  Blogging and at least uploading to Flickr on the regular has been my norm.  But sometimes norms change for a variety of reasons.  

I've been conserving my energy for some deep healing.  This has...been a year.  I'm giving myself the chance to do just what feels like it either absolutely needs to be done...or I'm notably moved to do.  That being said, I haven't picked up a regular camera in at least a couple weeks.  I've continued to work on my daily drawings, but not more painting as yet (although I did prepare a paper today).  I have a pinhole project in mind, but the time isn't right.

I've come to realize that as much as I'd like to think I was processing my emotions and taking care of my physical body, a lot was not given the kind of attention and ministrations that have been required.  What I've experienced in the past several years has been a challenge to move through...the grief has stuck hard.  Day in and day out I would "rise above" relying on nervous energy, with no real substance to back that up.  It all comes home to roost.  But I'm grateful I have the opportunity to finally, and in a focused and caring way, do the work that needs to be done.

 

getting help

It's time to up the ante.  It's time to let go of fears and see if something new will help.  The herbs, the food, the infusions just weren't cutting it.  My situation could be better, but since it is what it is, I have to work with that.

I charge other things on my altar...may as well charge this as well.

Did another painting today...drawing will come later.

 

 

 

projects

A little bit of watercolor.  A bit of mixed media (watercolor over cyanotype).  A collection of instant prints for another 'zine (considering a bit of haiku accompaniment).  Slow going.  Changing seasons.  Not quite as present as I'd like to be.

 

 

 

 

 

I'm still here...

I haven't been posting much.  It bothers me when I don't make pictures...well, I make Instagram pictures a lot, but that's not what I'm talking about.  I can't say for sure what's going with me right now.  Maybe it's the season changing, less light, but without the benefit of it being much cooler yet.  It takes patience to move through these episodes.  I'm not always very good at being patient...

For lack of anything particularly artful or interesting, here are some images from the morning.  Most everything is self explanatory, except maybe the last three which are of a foraged paw paw fruit, and a seedling paw paw tree in my garden.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

marking time...

change is coming...

The garden...and I...have had enough of summer.  The days of hot, steamy, stormy August are wearing on us.  Fortunately, there's a cold front approaching which, after the seemingly requisite storms (again!), will bring a little relief.  Already, the sun is at a different angle, there are tinges of change in the leaves on the trees, both of which are feeding into my desire for autumn.  I look forward to sunny days, maybe a bit warm, but cool nights.  I want to have a fire in the cauldron out back.  I want to bake apple crisp and pumpkin pie...to make soups and stews and casseroles.  I'm more than ready for this change.

In other news...I've added  new designs to my Society6 shop, one collection completely in keeping with the subject at hand, All things Autumn!.

The other collection is kinda nifty too, which uses my Cyanotype  work.

If you follow the link to the shop, even if you're not in the market for any of the products, could you do me a favor and "follow" the page?  I don't know for certain, but I suspect number of followers and faves on products probably help items getting more exposure.  Thanks!

 

 

 

A little bit of work...

As I've expressed...either here...or on YouTube...honestly, I'm not great at keeping track...I haven't made as much physical art work this summer as I'd hoped.  There has been a fair bit of tincture and oil making, drying and fermenting with garden produce.  But art work has been slow going.  I'm making the effort to be okay with that and give myself what I need to get to the next level.  But it can be frustrating.  It can be a bit discouraging.  I'm working with it.

I had posted a couple of images here (I think...again, maybe it was just on Flickr or Instagram) of the initial attempts at the pure cyanotype prints below.  These two, however, are the ones that finally met my satisfaction.  The wet cyanotype (with lime juice and tumeric) was made just to use up some sensitized paper.  I'm still hoping to add more prints along the lines of the first two, but they were not coming right away and I wanted to use that paper.  What I ended up making is a print of many of the medicinal and magical herbs in the garden...I think of it as "the witches garden".  The prints are on 18 x 24 inch watercolor paper.

It's unbearably hot and humid out today.  The front yard needed mowing and tidying, so I was out there as early as possible (which in reality, wasn't nearly early enough for comfort).  After that was all said and done I came in for my second shower of the day, and to sit cool and catatonic for a while!  Autumn, my love, please come soon, okay??