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It's felt like summer the past few days. The temperatures have been in the mid to upper 80's, with partly cloudy to sunny skies. I say it's felt like summer...minus all the bugs, the extreme humidity, and the violent thunderstorms. It's felt like the kind of summer I could live with for a few months. But for now, it makes for pleasant, warm, spring days.
...if it were a set of marbles!
Another day another pinhole.
Lots to do this morning, before I head up north to pick up Julian from Dulles airport. I'm looking forward to some much missed visiting. Yesterday was spent on the road with a friend, going to various nurseries and loading up my little Honda with a multitude of plants. We drove home in a delightful rolling nursery. So today I'm playing catch up with a few last minute tasks around the house.
It's going to feel like summer for a few days...but not the icky humid kind, thankfully.
My son comes to visit on Wednesday. I'll drive north to Dulles and pick him up in the evening. He'll be staying until Monday morning, leaving from Richmond. I've got a list of tasks I want to get done before he comes...cleaning, grocery shopping, maybe mowing the back yard! This is what I feel needs to be done, mind you...things that are probably not even on his radar. It's nice to have the house ship shape for guests though, even if guests are family. Plus, it's one of the few situations I can use to motivate myself to get my surroundings in such a pleasant state.
This will be the first time I've been with family in almost a year and a half. Julian, my son, is fully vaccinated and I've had one of mine (I also continue to live in moderate isolation), so I'm confident we'll be okay on the Covid front. It's so weird to think that all that time has elapsed since last communing with my offspring, or any relative. It simultaneously feels like forever and yesterday...time is a very, very strange thing. What with video, telephone, text, we have stayed in touch. There's a kind of Gestalt experience going on...filling in my life to make it feel whole and seamless, even though much has been missed and missing.
When I consider it, though, this goes back before the pandemic, essentially starting at the time I moved from California to Virginia. It has taken practically seven years to feel less weirded out by noting how much things have changed for me. Where am I? How did I get here?? For many years it was hard to settle into this new reality, as I had lived my old life, half my life at the time, within a consistent and rooted framework. Moving myself away from all that, to the other side of the country, scrambled my perceptions at times (many times). It's hard to describe the feeling, other than to say it has been surreal. Oddly enough, just within the last year (the year of so much strangeness and stress) have I felt more comfortable with where I am, who I am, and the complexity that my life process has brought me. That is something, a good something.
(more images from Pinhole Day 2021)
I managed to get myself out and shoot off a couple rolls of film in the Zero today. I have one roll of color film I'm going to send out to process. In the mean time, here are some monochrome images, shot with Fomapan 200. Patting myself on the back for processing and scanning this roll with such efficiency, so I could post here on my blog (and to Flickr...natch). At some point in the next few weeks I'll also post one to the Gallery at the Pinholeday.org site .
'RoidWeek has come and gone, but now I realize how addicted I've become to instant films (again!). Despite my camera's glitchiness, I've ordered a ridiculous amount of Instax wide film (both expired monochrome and fresh color) and am loosening my reins (even more than usual). I used a whole pack (10 shots) to finally hone in on these three (there is a fourth, but it's marginally redundant, even though it's satisfactory) pleasing results. Maybe by the time I work through this stash, I'll have a better idea of what I actually want to make, art wise, with this particular type of camera. I'm not yet on fire where inspiration is concerned. There will probably be lots of garden images coming up in the future.
In weather news, it's warming up. Rain later today and tonight is in the forecast.
I planted tomatoes yesterday. I need to find the pepper and eggplant varieties I desire. There are squash and cucumber seeds to put into their beds. Those wood chips will, unfortunately, not be spreading themselves, so I need to return to that task as well.
Time marches on...one week left of April. This totally trips me out when I think about it too much!
And the curtain closes on another 'RoidWeek. The next one will be in October (I think?). It's always interesting to see the folks who show up to post to the group on Flickr. It feels a bit like...old times? In any case, it's fun and inspiring.
Sadly, my Lomo'Instant is getting progressively glitchier. It seems the little arm that pushes the film through the rollers is getting stuck. I need to decide whether I'll go through the hassle of trying to get the camera replaced (again) or scale up to a MintRF70 (which is terribly pricey). I'm thinking before I spring for the next level, instant film camera-wise, I need to get a better sense of how I want to use the photos in my artwork. In the mean time, I'll keep babying along what I have.
TGIF...it's a good evening for a gin and tonic...
It's chilly out today. But from my wander in the garden, it doesn't appear there was frost. The plants look happy.
Spring is funny, particularly in this area. It seems all seasons can happen within a day or two. But the light says spring to me, as do the blossoms and the bright green new growth everywhere.
Today is day five of 'RoidWeek. Tomorrow is the last day. And then... Pinhole Day on Sunday. I'm ready with film and will hopefully feel inspired. Well, even if I'm not inspired, I'll still make pinholes. And then my son comes to visit mid-week! Lots for which to look forward.
I've developed a bad habit of immediately checking my phone when I wake up. How's the weather? Do I have emails (rarely do I get important emails)? Who has posted to Flickr, Instagram? What memories are showing up on FaceBook? I'm not exactly sure why I do this, but my suspicion is that it has to do with a need for connection. Living alone can some times be hard...living in isolation, during a pandemic, has amplified that.
When talking to my counselor yesterday, I noted how I felt off. I couldn't pinpoint this unsettledness. Through our discussion, I came to the conclusion it had to do with an uncertainty of purpose. What is my purpose at this point in my life after all? After years of raising a family and feeling like I had a vital role, living just for myself has been confusing. In addition, through the past year I've curtailed volunteer efforts and even a work situation (which in reality wasn't healthy, so it was a good decision). Easing back into a semblance of purposefulness is going to take reflection and settledness. To circle back on my first paragraph, the morning habit of compulsively checking in isn't helpful.
This morning when I woke, I tried something different. The window was cracked so I listened to the crescendo of birdsong, noting the different calls and the change in volume over time. Then I breathed, deeply, and started to imagine all the people in the world I know and don't know. What are my friends in Europe doing at this moment? Is it lunchtime there, are they at work, what is blossoming in their yards? I thought about my friends here in the eastern U.S. time zone. Who is up? Have they had their coffee, are their dogs or cats tended to, are they already at work? Then I thought of my friends and family on the west coast. Are they sleeping soundly, what are they dreaming? Will they wake to sunshine, or has the fog softly blanketed their neighborhood?
I have to say, this little practice did a far better job at allowing me a sense of connection, than any virtual check in. I think I shall make it a habit...
Day two of 'RoidWeek 2021... It's Monday morning and there's a cool spring rain falling. The pollen is getting washed away, so all the hues of new green growth and multicolored blossoms are popping.
The spring this year has generally been mild. No extreme lows or snowstorms, just a few unseasonably warm (yet pleasant) days. This week has a couple mornings forecast to be at near freezing temperatures. So far, there aren't any tender plants in the garden so it's not a problem for me. Even if that were the case, I'd be able to protect anything that was small. I'm grateful for no intensely severe weather yet (even though there was that threat a time or two), since summer usually brings that on.
There is hope in the air. Of course, it's a mixed bag as always...we live in a complex world. But that being said, I can feel the collective spirit rising. There's still work to do (work on so many fronts), but it feels like there's some light ahead.