The Third Act

Palm Sunday

I grew up Catholic, but have spent the majority of my life not associated with the church.  There are problems that I have with certain issues related to Catholicism, but I also know good people who practice the religion.  

I'm an agnostic at this point in my life.  My beliefs depend on my own personal experience.  I like science.  I also appreciate the unseen and esoteric world...there is magic everywhere.  If there are any rules I tend to live by they would be to do as little harm as possible and to treat others respectfully.  Not one hundred percent easy, but a decent goal.  Oh, and maybe also to take responsibility for my own stuff.

But I still remember the ritual of my childhood, with relation to religion.  I think Catholicism has a ton of pagan symbology that has been incorporated into its practices, as it had centuries to absorb ancient, cultural rites.  So, as far as Palm Sunday goes, I remember the procession harkening back to Jesus on the donkey coming into town, the blessing of palms for the the new religious year (somehow they became a protective talisman for the home, not unlike brooms over doorways or rosemary being planted at the gate, etc etc), and the burning of the palms from the previous year and subsequent burial of the ashes.  All that sounds pagan to me.  And maybe that's why I still have fond memories of it.

It's a beautiful spring day.  The temperatures are slightly chilly, but it seems frosts have finally passed.  In the coming week we'll warm back up again.  Like the temperatures, I still feel a little "in between" and am looking forward to more consistency ahead.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday

I went to my friend's wedding today.  It's the first wedding I've been to in almost six years.  Not that I attend many weddings, though.  In August my nephew will be getting married in Cleveland and I'll go to that too.  I guess it's just that kinda year for me (no complaints!).

I was so very happy for my friend today.  I felt how happy she was and that made me happy.  Weddings are fun...joyful.  That being said, I don't ever see myself getting married again.  Well, I mean first I'd have to have someone to feel like I wanted to marry, right??  Anyway, I had no longing today, no desire for another wedding for myself.  But at the same time, the celebration just made me so darn delighted!

I left the venue for home a bit early.  Driving in the dark is something I'd rather avoid.  It was quite the golden hour.  The skies had been cloudy most of the afternoon but as the sun was getting lower in the sky, it hit a clear patch.  At one point I drove past some fields with dandelions all in their pompom form.  It looked like an expanse of little glowing spheres as they were lit by the angle of sunshine.  And I thought, "You know what I'd really like to have...not really a husband but a sidekick...who likes to drive and is willing to pull over when I say, 'wait, let me catch that with my camera!'"  Of course, there would be more of a connection than that, but I could get into that requirement.  

I also thought how I don't mind driving (except in the dark), but it's really, really frustrating to be behind the wheel when I'm traveling through places I haven't been, which have interesting things to see.  If I'm going some place new, I like to look around and take in the environment.  Not necessarily a great way to drive safely.  Now, I always do drive safely so the frustrating part is how much it seems like I miss out on.  Ah well, little inconveniences.

 

 

 

Friday

Another lovely spring day in the garden...

 

 

deer tracks

 

peony-like tulip

 

dogwood and red oak

 

 

 

foggy morning

I walked around the yards this morning.  The air was cool and damp.  It felt just like northern California on the coast.  Delightful!

Normally I'm not a fan of gray skies (when they come too close together), but the attendant moisture in the air today feels nourishing.

 

 

 

 

out back

Little plants are evolving in the back yard woods.  The first of the azaleas is blooming, more mayapple are popping up with one opening its umbrella, and a little blue cohosh emerged, which I thought had disappeared.  She didn't come up last year so I was surprised to see this shoot!  What a delight.

The rain last night was welcome.  While there was no deluge (thankfully), there was a period of moderate to heavy  showers.  Since I'd put in a few more plants yesterday, so much the better.

Now it's cloudy.  It's not cold and the forecast is to reach near 70F.  Tomorrow is predicted to bring more rain, then cooler temps for a while.  I'm happy as long as we don't dip under freezing again!

 

 

 

 

 

pussy willows

There are probably more things in the plant world that seem almost animal-like, but to me pussy willows top the list.  I could imagine them being teeny tiny mice, or something similar.  So soft, like fur.

 

 

 

Monday

A friend of mine from YouTube has been posting a series of "motley Monday" videos.  As I sit here, taking my tea, still in my robe and slippers, the thoughts just started rolling through my head and I figured I'd do my own little motley Monday post...

First off, I had a fun time yesterday making pizza (and breaking in my KitchenAid mixer for the dough) for dinner.  I invited a neighbor over  because home made pizza needs to be shared.  The day had been beautiful, as was the evening.  That being said, by the time we were touring the garden after sunset the temperatures certainly had dropped.  Anyway, no complaints.

My sleep was actually okay last night, although when I woke up this morning and was checking weather/emails etc on my phone I could feel a panic attack coming on.  I was like, "Are you kidding me? I just woke up!" Apparently I actually have developed some coping tools because with a few deep breaths and self talk, it abated.  I think I've been bingeing far too many House episodes! 

It's weird how my brain works.  After being up and about, taking my meds, having tea, doing Wordle and stepping back to see the very [personally fortunate] big picture, I'm feeling better.  Sure, there are currently a number of issues that are stressful in my life, but that's pretty much the same for most humans, right?  And yes, since I've come to the conclusion I'm wired for intimate companionship, the stress is often more challenging than it should be, but I've learned to handle it alone.

I look for those glimmers of joy and hope.  I latch on to those to carry me through.  I hold on to the notion that deep inside I have the answers to how to live a satisfying, rich, and creative life.  The discovery process is for the long haul and I'm ok with that.

 

 

 

 

Sunday

 

In the garden on this beautiful spring day...

 

 

tulip

 

clove scented black currant blossoms

 

blueberry blossoms

 

Japanese maple blossoms

 

chokecherry blossom bud spike (first time blooming since planted five years ago)

 

lettuce

 

carrot seedling

 

beet seedling

 

bush cherry blossoms

Saturday

It was the perfect day to get the yards all tidy...

 

 

 

 

Pu-erh

I've known about pu-ehr tea for years.  There's usually some in my cabinet.  That being said, it's always been a novelty, with my daily black tea tea being a smokey blend I make.

Lately though, I've been drawn back to pu-erh.  I like the super earthy, almost savory flavor.  Before, it seemed slightly funky, but I've grown to appreciate it.  Turns out, this tea is actually fermented, unlike other teas which just go through the oxidation process at varying degrees.  Also, do a web search and you'll find all the alleged benefits!  The one I'm most curious about is its effect on cholesterol (since my LDL is slightly elevated).  Apparently pu-erh has some naturally occurring lovastatin in it.  Who knew?  Well, someone did just not me.

I asked my acupuncturist yesterday about this subject.  She said in China it's known for weight loss, but yes also for lowering cholesterol and longevity.  She's funny, she said it's also called "old people" tea, admitting herself to gravitating to it and black tea as she's aged.  I kinda love that.

This tea comes in compressed cake forms, but also loose leaf.  Over the coming months I'll see which kinds I like the best.